You’re sitting there, after your millionth trip to the office Keurig machine. Practically shaking from all the caffeine and your boss comes in and makes yet another borderline, HR questionable comment. Do you take it up the chain and just wait for her to retaliate (and you know, she will) or do you count down until 5 and fantasize about how you plan on leaving that dump for greener pastures (see photo)?
I remember fantasizing with people I used to work with about how it would feel to quit at one of our dorky sales meetings. Bags would be all packed and at the awards ceremony that evening you slowly rise to accept your award and say “Thank you for this award. It’s been nice working with you all. I quit!” And out you go to the suitcase and waiting Uber to the airport just like on The Apprentice. The hundreds of sales reps just start to clap and not the golf clap kind of clap, the real deep clap that someone would use when their favorite team just hit a home run.
You think about these things over and over again. What you would say. What you will say if he or she makes another comment like “X”. You keep a list to remind yourself not to burn a bridge and to remember why you like the job. The list for the “cons” just seems to inch its way longer each week. You keep another list of all the reasons why you should quit and what HR and everyone in that place should really know about who you work for. You crunch your finances to see if you actually can afford to quit without having another job lined up and how much time you have before you need to find one. You read inspirational books and blogs in the hopes that you can turn your sullied attitude around. You speak to your friends and family about your tribulations ad nauseam and they all try to convince you to grin and bear it and just find another job before leaving this one. Nothing helps.
It’s all just a dream until it becomes the reality. Sigh. So, what’s your quitting fantasy?